Weird Worm Update and Writing How To Articles

A few months ago, I wrote an article about writing humor for Weird Worm (with links to some of my other humor articles). I've gotten back into writing articles for the site, and here are a few of my newer ones:

5 Fashion Trends That Double As Self Defense

7 Examples of Urban Entertainment That Could End In Disaster

7 Avatar Image Types Explained

7 "Comforting" Mom Sayings That Really Aren't

7 Types of Beach Personalities

To see a complete list of my articles, and to learn more about the site (and writing for it!), check out Freelance Writing for Weird Worm.

I've also just finished a how-to guide titled Learn How To Write How To Articles - useful if you're interested in writing for how-to sites such as eHow. It's really not that hard to get started, although like any type of writing it's an art that can only be perfected over time. My guide lists sites where you can inform and educate people about your own expertise - and make money online while doing it!

Morphemes: Inventing Words for Speculative Fiction Authors

Authors of speculative fiction (science fiction, fantasy, alternate history, etc.) often need to describe people, places, and things outside the normal realm of experience. There are three basic ways to do this:

1.) Use a combination of standard English words. For example, if your characters use bodies of water to travel between different dimensions, you can call them 'waterwalkers' or 'water-walkers.'

Pros: It's easy for your reader to know what you're talking about.

Cons: Limits creativity. Also, these terms don't necessarily call attention to themselves, and can be lost in the rest of your prose.

2.) Make a word up from scratch. In this case, you might call the water-walking characters 'lisorbb.'

Pros: Absolute creative control.

Cons: Many readers abhor the made-up word. Used too frequently, they can turn all but the most dedicated reader away, as I talked about in my post on different types of fantasy novels.

3.) Use the basic building blocks of the English language to invent a word more or less within the accepted boundaries of word formation. In order to do this, you can parse a word into morphemes, a.k.a. basic units of English taken from the ancient languages (usually Latin and Greek) that originated English. Say you wanted to create a new word to mean 'waterwalker.' Water has a Latin morpheme of 'hydr' (as in 'hydropower') and walk has a Greek morpheme of 'ambl' (as in 'amble'). So we could call the waterwalkers 'hydramblers,' if we'd like.

Pros: High level of creative control. Works best if you use easily recognizable morphemes.

Cons: Still might throw some readers off.

And no, I'm not fluent in either Greek or Latin. I use an excellent book that I bought as a textbook for a class on the origin of the English language. The book is English Vocabulary Elements by Keith Denning and William R. Leben. (William Leben actually taught the class I took.) I mostly use the list of Greek and Latin morphemes at the back of the book as a reference guide. And yeah, I know I'm not following the 'rules' for word formation, but that's my creative license at work!

The book is also handy if you're interested in learning why certain words are the way they are. Did you know that the 'hyster' in 'hysterical' actually comes from the Greek morpheme for 'womb?' Because back in the day, 'hysterics' was an actual disease women were diagnosed with. Grrr.

I think that inventing words has the potential to add another dimension to speculative fiction. We do it all the time in real life: how long has 'vloggers' been around? So why not use it in our writing?

Morning Owls - Writing In The A.M.

Recently, I've had some trouble keeping up with my daily writing schedule. I usually leave my writing to the last minute, so that I'm trying to be creative and do something I enjoy when I'm exhausted and spent. It's like spending a day at the beach with a bad hangover.

In addition, I'm not a morning person, and the habit of staying up late trying to write just makes it worse. I'm lucky that my current job allows me to roll out of bed around 8:30 to make it to work by 9. However, I often find myself pushing the limits, trying to stay safely ensconced in my bed for just a few minutes longer. And it's not just me; many creative people I've met share this tendency towards loving the night.

Luckily, I just discovered a new goal that I hope will help alleviate both of these issues: write first thing in the morning! This might sound like crazy talk, given that I already push the limits of how long I can stay at home before leaving for work, but just bear with me for a moment. Before I started writing first thing in the morning, my train of thought upon waking would look something like this:

Ugh. Morning again. Stupid dog kept me up last night. So tired. What do I have to do today? Let's see, get up, shower, then go to work. I've got some people to email, then I have to call people and try and sell them a product they're not interested in. I wonder if the software manual needs updating? I wonder if this is really the kind of work I should be doing at this time in my life? Maybe I'll just stay in bed today.

After I started writing first thing in the morning, my thoughts changed to this:

Morning again. Stupid... Oh yeah, gotta turn on my laptop and write something. But what? Let's see, Elish just ran into Eydie the Unbearable, and she's trying to figure out if the girl is the Wise One she's looking for. Hey! Wouldn't it be interesting if I had those evil women find her at Eydie's house, and then there'd be a chase? That would definitely spice things up.

Writing excites to me. I love it; I enjoy it. It's so much nicer to wake up to something you enjoy than to something you dread. Until I can support myself as an author, I have to stick with my day job, and this helps me do that without going crazy.

Now the only hard part is putting away the laptop so I won't be (too) late for work...

Three Reasons To Attend The Dreaded Networking Event

On July 22, I'll be attending a networking event in Washington, DC with other Stanford alumni and their friends and families. Once upon a time, my first reaction to a potential networking event would have been, "Ugh, do I have to?" followed by, "Ugh, I guess I should," in turn followed by me most likely skipping the event at the last minute. But after experiencing several of these events first hand, I'd like to share my new, improved attitude.

Here are three reasons to attend the Dreaded Networking Event:

1.) Networking is Fun!

People who don't like meeting new people will tell me that they'd rather have cavities filled without anesthesia than go to a networking event. I'll let you in on a secret: I'm one of you! It's not easy for me to approach strangers. I always worry that I'll do or say something wrong. But despite my shyness, I've had a great time at every event I've been to. There's often tasty, free food and drink. The people are tuned into 'friendly mode,' and so even if you don't approach anyone, someone is likely to talk to you. And if you've decided to attend/been invited to an event, you likely have something in common with other people at the event, making conversation a snap.

2.) Networking is Profitable!

Granted, the profitability of a networking event isn't as direct as, say, calling someone on the phone and trying to sell to him or her. But so far, I've had the great fortune to meet several published authors and editors, and subsequently added these contacts to my lists on Facebook, Linkedin, GoodReads, etc. An author is much more likely to write a blurb for my novel if she or he knows me, and one of those editors is more likely to read my work if I make a note of our conversation at X networking event. Building a solid network of connections is the surest way to success for almost any industry.

3.) Networking is Healthy!

Let's face it, spending hours hunched in front of your computer writing every day may be intellectually stimulating, but it's not very healthy for your body or social skills. Us writers tend to miss out on the physical activity we need and the social stimulation we crave. Attending a networking event forces us to actually, physically go somewhere, to (gasp!) stand and walk around, and to converse in person with fellow human beings. Who knows, you might even get an inspiration for your next story! Just try to go easy on those delicious high-calorie appetizers and desserts if you want to maximize the health benefits.

In order to take advantage of these benefits, find networking meetings for an organization you're in, or if there aren't any, join a new organization. Grab a drink and a plate, introduce yourself to someone, and let yourself enjoy networking.

More Google Tips For Writers

Those of you in the know know the importance of regularly checking up on yourself using Google (or the internet search engine of your choice). It's good to know what other people are reading about you and others who share your name. For example, when I Google my name, I find out that I'm a Dairy Princess in Oregon. Not really, but at least now I know what's going on when someone confuses me with that other Emma Larkins. And I definitely don't want to be the last one to find out that someone is posting embarrassing pictures of me!

I always Google the title ideas for my stories and novels. True, my working title may not end up as the final title if the book gets published. But when I'm promoting my works in progress, I want people to easily find information on them, and not have to sift through loads of non-applicable entries.

It's probably a good idea to search for the names of your characters as well. I know that you get the disclaimer at the beginning of the novel that states that all of the names and events are made up, but it's still preferable not to use names of existing senators or famous Bollywood actors (unless you really want to stir up some controversy).

Amazon - A Surprising Way To Boost Your Visibility

I recently reviewed a purchase and set up my profile on Amazon. During my most recent Google search on my name, lo and behold, my Amazon profile was the second site on the list.

That's pretty impressive. My blog, which I have posted to regularly over the past three months, came in sixth place, and my Technorati profile didn't even make the first page.

This means that I've just found another way to reach people who Google me for one reason or another. I suppose that if you don't want your Amazon comments way up there on the list of sites associated with your name, you shouldn't set up a profile. But if you're a writer, and you make some thoughtful reviews of books related to your work, you can easily increase your visibility on the internet with this simple technique.

(Disclaimer - this method will be most effective for newbies with relatively low traffic to their own sites, such as me!)

Five Steps to Short Story Fortune and Fame

Any writer can benefit from getting a short story published. It's great for your self esteem (and occassionaly, your pocket) to see your name in print and know that somewhere, someone chose YOUR piece to publish out of a great big submissions pile. And the benefits don't stop there. If you're interested in publishing a novel someday, getting short stories published can up your credibility. Even if short fiction isn't your final goal, publishing short stories can keep your writing skills in shape, hone your craft, and get you noticed.

So - how does one go about writing a short story for publication? I won't call myself an expert, because I'm not widely published (yet!), but my current tact is to study the themes of published short stories and try to apply what I've learned to my own writing. Here are my observations, boiled down to five easy-to-follow steps.

1.) Set the setting.

Each published short story I've read takes place in a specific place and time, be it Prehistoric Africa, a Southern U.S. farm in the early 20th century, or present-day Boston. The setting is established early on, clearly and succinctly. Know your setting from the start, and know it well.

2.) Introduce characters.

You can't have too many characters in a short story without making things confusing, so each character needs to be unique and powerful. You could create an old man with one eye who loves the opera, perhaps, or a young woman searching for fame in a big city as a yodeler.

3.) Make something happen.

It should be a new event in the life of your characters, or an old event that happens in a new way. For example, a stranger approaches the house in the middle of the night. A big producer comes to a small town and decides to buy a young man's play. The 8:05 train fails to show up at the station on schedule. This initial, unusual event acts as the catalyst for the story.

4.) Follow the characters' reactions to the story's conclusion.

The way the characters deal with the new event will determine the direction of the story. Does the man who loses his job get depressed or start a new life? Does the passenger who misses her flight find love or lose it? At this point, there are usually a series of mini-climaxes leading up to the conclusion, in which the action of the story is resolved. Or, potentially, the reader is left to furnish his or her own resolution.

5.) Give the story a flavor.

None of the above items need to be incredibly bizarre to make a good story. You can write about a Midwestern housewife coming across a bird with a broken wing on her way to the supermarket, or a tax attorney losing papers for an important account. Adding your own special twists on language, voice, theme, etc., will make the story engaging, and make it yours.

I know it's not necessarily as easy as all that, but it's a start. Give it a try and see if you can whip something up. Then grab a Writer's Market book at the library or search online for short fiction publishers and send it out. It won't do any harm, and you might end up with success before you know it!

del.icio.us: Social Bookmarking as Promotion Tool

Okay, so I'm pretty sure I'm one of the last people on the internet to discover the site del.icio.us. The tastiness of the name has caught my eye many times in the past, but I've always been too intimidated to give it a look. To me it was some scary internet phenomenon meant only for internet uber-masters, something akin to rss feeds (still trying to figure out how those work.) The mysterious url format threw me off. How would I even access it? Did I need to have a special widget to run it? Would I have to locate and install drivers off a mirror site in China? Would it hurt?

Anyways, turns out it really is just a plain old url, and it's not scary or difficult at all. So just in case you're like me and you're new to the site, here's what you need to know.

To get started, you create a profile, and then add a bunch of bookmarks for your favorite websites. You can add a button to your toolbar to simplify the process. Once you bookmark a site, you enter a description and a bunch of tags. The tags will help you in the future when you've collected links to many sites and want to search for only the ones about, say, Tolkien. Or hot dogs. Except you can't use spaces, so the tag would have to be hot.dogs or hot-dogs.

So how does this link back to promoting your writing? Well, the more times people bookmark your site, the higher it ranks on the Popular list (similar to Digg), and the more likely it is that people will find their way there. Also, you can create a network of fellow users, and share your sites with them. And here's one more thing to try: go to the Popular page, and take a look at the tags there. I'm not saying that you should add a bunch of unrelated tags to your sites, but if you see something there that applies to you, by all means use it. For example, this blog is intended to help people with writing/getting published, so I could tag it as "howto" and make it easier for people to find their way here. It's all about connecting people to the information they want as expeditiously as possible.

Thanks to this article on The Dough Roller for getting me to try out del.icio.us!